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Showing posts from May, 2010

Money matters.............

David Laws the new Treasury Boss in the new UK government.
Has quit amid a expenses scandal.
Now watch how the press try to make this a Gay thing.
As Mr Laws was claiming expenses,
that were paid to his boyfriend.
It's purely a money thing.
When will the people in the political spotlight,
learn to behave ?

Soon Pratt "Less"

Well,well, seems like Heidi Montag has awoken,
She's left the Pratt.
She's has realized that he isolated,
her from the right people.
What wonderful news.
Now let's pray,
she goes to the divorce lawyer on Monday.

Belinda's Lips

80's Icon Belinda Carlisle's autobiography,
"Lips Unsealed" hits bookshelves June 1st.
It's going to make Jackie Collins's books,
look like kindergarten colouring books.

"Shushybye" you heard it here 1st......

Parents, I have watched the development of "Shushybye's" for the last couple of years.
I knew from the moment I first saw "Shushybye'" that not only would this be huge......
But that it would also be wonderful for the development of the Children of the World"
Watch for the "Shushybye Tour" coming to a city near you.
http://www.shushybye.com/
As you know I never recommend stuff.
But this is the exception.

50 Cents ="Oscar"

50 cent the rapper/actor.
Has dropped over 100lbs.
For a part in a movie.
About a footballer fighting cancer.
"Oscar" calling.......NOT ! He must beware of driving summer 2012.

What a divorce, Why ?

Ashley Cole, footballer, 
member of the England team.
Is shocked that his wife 
Cheryl Cole.
Has filed divorce papers.
Ashley..... 
YOU CHEATED !
What a dick.
In true passive/aggressive form......
He'll wait till she's a low point.
Then move in to get her back.
Just to then dump her later,

No Nanny No............

Jordan, is at it again.....
This time it's about "Nannies"
She won't let her ex hubby see his stepson.
Why, well she doesn't like his choice of Nanny.
Somebody call Nanny 911.
Jordan, needs a spanking............

Poser Palin........

Rumour has it that Sarah Plain,
she that can see Russia from her kitchen.
Is pondering posing for "Playboy".
Yeah, I know..stupid.......
But she is stupid............
Plus she's greedy enough,
for the Fame & the Money.

Another Bloody Moron......

Joe Francis he of "Girls Gone Wild" fame.
Is yet again in big trouble.
He is accused of attacking two female employees.
Why?
Well he thinks,
they were selling info about him to media people. Dickhead. Anyway he's just going to keep getting into trouble  with the cops for years. Wait till 2012 he'll loose a lawsuit costing millions.
2013 even worse BANKRUPTCY....

WTF?

Two ten year old British school boys.
Were found guilty of attempted rape.
What is the World coming to?
Where are the parents?
Why were these boys roaming the streets?

In Wshington, it's called lobbying.......

So everybody is having a go,
at the Duchess Of York.
aka Fergie.......
For making a deal to introduce.
A guy she thought was a business man,
to her ex hubby Prince Andrew.
For a fee, granted a big one.
This goes on in business all the time.
It's called an introduction fee.
How many of those throwing stones.
Do exactly the same thing I wonder.

Back to school....

Jon & Kate Gosselin.
Have been ordered by a judge,
to attend parenting school.
Complete waste of time.
Why? they already have eight children.
If they haven't learned to parent by now.
They never will, school or no school. The good news is though the show will get canned in 2011.

Bloody diamonds...

Super Model Naomi Campbell,
Could be in court soon.
Due to War Crimes.
Seems she got a diamond,
(aka Blood Diamond)
from a war criminal.....
This is going to get nasty.

'Boy....BOLLOCKS"

"Boyzone" member Ronan Keating,
Has run off with one of the bands,
backing dancers one "Francine Cornell"
Bloody idiot........
It won't ;ast.
Then he'll be sorry.
But thankfully,
his wife won't take him back.
LOSER...........

Just waiting......

David Cameron Britain's
fill in Prime Minister.
Is on a beating to nowhere.
He is so "Ivory Towered"
He truly doesn't have a clue.
Wait till summer of 2011. When the cracks appear  & the towers begin to fall. Big business will be the cause.
God, help the Brits. Especially 2012......

Well soon..

Adam Ant, the 80's popstar,
Has been placed in a mental hospital.
Hopefully he'll be fine.
Personally I think he'll be fine.
After all we "ALL" have odd moments.

Bradangelina.........needs glue......

Well, well the cracks 
are widening in,
the relationship between.
Brad Pitt & Angelina Jolie.
(Seems she has the claws out,
for Johnny Depp. 
Not that she'll get him).
I'll give Bradangelina till Sept 2012.
Although, he may give in, to marriage
it won't last.
(If Johnny & Vanessa get past 2012 all will be well).
Brad's just like best pal  George Clooney who  isn't into "marriage" either.

"BIRK" head's........yard sale......

Larry "Birk"head,
father of the late Anna Nicole Smith's,
daughter Dannilyn.
Is selling off Anna's stuff.
What a prick.
He should save it for Dannilyn.
Then when she's eighteen,
she could decide.
But just wait till he puts Dannilyn to work. It's all about the MONEY.

Picture purrrrrrfect

Lindsay Lohan, has a new girlfriend.
A photographer & cougar called,
" Indrani".
13 years Lindsay's senior.
Great, I think this relationship,
will get Lindsay to grow and mature.
I can feel the blood beginning to boil,
in Lindsay's Dad's veins.

Flat Broke.......

Hell raiser Pop singer Pete Doherty.
Claims he's broke.
He's living in a rented dumpy rented flat,
in Camden, London.
Well, duh......
Drugs are very expensive........
No drugs....
Better living.
Idiot..............

Sir Botox....

Looks like Simon Cowell,
will be on HRH's
birthday honours list this year.
Making him Sir Simon Cowell.
God help us..............

Pucker Lady Gaga......

Lady Gaga is learning to speak English.
With a cut glass accent,
just like HRH.
Good for her........
It will certainly help her singing.
As it will make her pronounce,
the end of words correctly.
However it won't gt her,
an invite to sit on the throne..

Not for long.........

UK comedian David Walliams,
wed Lara Stone.
Over the weekend at wonderful ceremony.
At Claridges Hotel in London.
Attended by all the A List celebrities.
However, it's doomed.......
Think Elton John & his wedding
in Sydney, Australia.

Geldof, not pleased.............

A shit called Ben Bluet Mills.
Has hawked  naked pics of Peaches Geldof.
Daughter of Bob & Paula.
Grand daughter of Jess Yates.
Peaches your Mum & your Grandad,
are tuning in their graves.
Grow up........
If you do Peaches in 2012 BABY news for you.

Mommy 911 from Heidi.......

Heidi Montag called the cops,
on her mother yesterday.
After her Mum turned up unannounced,
at Heidi & Pratt's house.
Mum is concerned for her daughter.
(I don't blame her)
Now Heidi is asking,
for a restraining order against her Mum.
Heidi, you should be getting the order,
against the Pratt you live with.
This is going to turn very nasty.

From TV to Jail........

TV Chef Jaun-Carlos,
of " Calorie Commando" fame.
Is in clinky,
accused of trying to hire homeless people.
To murder someone for him.
The police know who he wanted killed.
But wait till they find,
out the others he wanted done in too.

Tom, will have to wait........

Katie Holmes has been offered,
the role of Jackie Kennedy,
in a new 8hr TV mini series.
Which of course she has taken.
Which is going to put a hold on,
Tom's desire to have another child.
Wonder what excuse she'll use once,
the show has wrapped.

Pee, Poo & more Poo......

Mr & Mrs Pratt.......
Are not good at keeping the house clean.
They let their dogs pee & poo,
all over the house.
When Heidi gets upset about the mess.
Mr Pratt, tells her to pick it up.
Seems to me that Mr Pratt,
like the dogs isn't housebroken.

M.J. red faces on tape

So tapes have been released that show,
Micheal Jackson, had a troubled mind.
This is a surprise?
If you came from that family,
you'd have a troubled mind.
Wait till the rest of the tapes are released.
Then there will be some red faces. Secrets (open) that will shock the World.

Oblivion soon

So those idiots of the "Jersey Shore",
TV show, now filming  season 2.
Got some bad news today.
They are all going to be replaced for season 3.
Couldn't happen to nicer people.
They won't work after season 2.
So peace is on the way. Wait till companies start paying them  "NOT" to use their products.........

Full sentence, Lil

Lil Wayne, who is in prison for a year.
Is already in trouble.
He was caught with a pair of earphones,
and a ipod charger.
A big no no.
Lil Wayne won't be getting out early.

Cat fight in Hollywierd

Lindsay Lohan and Avril Lavigne.
Are having a spat.
It started at the very swanky,
Chateau Marmont in Hollywood.
Seems Lindsay,
went too close to Avril's table.
Not done, in Hollywierd, with out an invite.
This is going to get alot worse. he he.

No 10 yet again?

Don't think that just because Gordon Brown,
has said he'll step down.
(as he says not till September)
That he has given up.
What he is up to,
is a stroke of genius.
Just wait and see.

Harry "Roid" Potter

Harry Potter aka Daniel Radcliffe.
Is trying to get a body like.
Footballer Cristiano Ronaldo.
For his next Broadway role.
Daniel darling,
you'll need steroids, lots of them.
Or it won't happen.
Romantic heartbreak in Autumn 2012.

Truth will out, in time.....

So Andrew Cowles, telling his version.
Of what happened the night his husband,
Stephen Gately, of "Boyzone" fame died.
The problem is, it is his "version"
However, one day the true version,
will be told to his family.
Then watch the feathers fly.

Tea with Lillibet for Gary.........

Seems "Take That" boy band member  Gary Barlow.
Has been rubbing elbows, with the Queen.
The real one.
(Not those that manage boy bands).
She wants him to be her party planner.
For two big events.
Her 82nd birthday in 2011.
The other her Diamond Jubilee in 2012. Hope her QE2's hubby makes it that far. Hubby's health needs to be watched at Xmas.
I smell a knighthood. For Gary.  Or at least an OBE for starters....

Not welcome in Hollywood

A reporter called Ramin Setoodeh.
Who writes Newsweek.
Wrote an article in which he states.
Straight men can play "Gay",
but Gay men can't play "Straight"
What a load of "BOLLOCKS"
Ramin, good luck in getting,
any more interviews in Hollywood.
Haven't you heard of the
"Lavender" mafia?

Pratt at it again.....

Darlene Egelhoff,
Spencer Pratt's mother in law.
Is facing foreclosure.
When the moron Spencer Pratt.
Heard the news he stated;
" Best news I have heard all week".
Indeed a PRATT & a complete WANKER.

West End Susan........

Seems like Susan Boyle will play Fantine.
Well at least for one performance.
Cameron Mackintosh, wants her for,
the 25th Anniversary of Les Miserables.
In London later this year.
She'll be fabulous.

Yeah right.....

Don't take the romance between.
Cheryl Cole & rapper WILL.I.AM.
To go anywhere.
It's a PR stunt.
But when the R Kelly "Cult"..
Is exposed, 
that won't be a PR stunt..

Dick in a shed.....

Comic/actor Andy Dick,
now lives in a plastic garden shed.
With a rabbit for a room mate.
Maybe this will sort him out.
No it won't.
Things are about,
to get really terrible for
Mr Dick.
Including a lawsuit he,
won't be able to recover from.

Lindsay low down....

So Lindsay Lohan has signed on to play
Linda Lovelace the porn star.
In a movie about Lovelace's life.
Well in Lindsay's favour,
she won't have many lines to learn.
But personally I think this will.
Turn out to be the death nail, in her career. Altough I don't think she'll do it the end. As the director will end up dropping her.

Them cheating Bones........

"Bones" hunky lead David Boreanaz,
has confessed to cheating.
But he only did so, after his mistress.
Went public.
Well, is going to get a lot worse.
Just wait till the mistress tree get's a good shake.
See them all come falling down.

Dancing back to success.....

Julianne Hough will be back on next seasons DWTS. Seems her country career didn't quite take off. Never mind Julianne. Try this, do DWTS and do the country stuff on the side. Because when you are on the box, every week people remember you. When you aren't they don't.

Country goes " WEHO"

Country Superstar Chely Wright,
has come out of the closet.
Well this is going to get very interesting.
As of all the music genres country,
is the most homophobic.
But I think she'll be more popular,
in the long run.

Ding,Dong times two...

So Mariah Carey & Nick Cannon,
married just two years.
Renewed their vows the other day.
Pray tell, what are they trying to prove?
That they are married?
Or that it is a real marriage?
My thought.
"Ye doth protest too much". However they will be pregnant by years end.
Times two, one of each.......

Pussy,pussy I thee Wed....

Uwe Mitzscherlich, a German nutter.
Has married his cat.
He bribed an official to make it legal.
OK I could say something naughty.
But, this is OK ?
But same sex marriage is not.
So much for sanctity of marriage.

Pratt poison....

Spencer Pratt is a Pratt.
He's now trying to market an energy drink.
That has a connection to those Jersey Shore idiots
Can you imagine drinking anything that twit has touched.
NO.
It won't go anywhere, even if he does launch it.

Bouquet....incoming....

Throwing Diva Naomi Campbell is set to marry
Russian billionaire  Vladislav Doronin.
Let's hope everything in the church
& at the reception in glued down.
It won't last.
She said the money doesn't matter.
Bollocks.
It's all about the money.

Justin tween

"Tween" pop star Justin Bieber.
Is being exploited left right and centre.
Someone with his real interests,
i.e. a PARENT !
Needs to step in and take charge. Before the nasty stuff starts to turn up. In the fall of 2011........
As well as heart break in 2012. Along with bad behaviour that even Canadians find offensive.

Humbug Limbargh.

Rush Limbargh that hate spewing
radio talk show host.
Is back to comparing,
President Obama to Hitler.
Just because there is "Free Speech" .
Doesn't mean it's free.
Rush needs to take a look at himself.